Blissful Ignorance

Engaged

2006-06-06T06:03:45Z

We're engaged! and by we, I mean, Pamela and I. I got her dad's permission last Wednesday; and I proposed on Saturday June 3rd. I set up a relatively formal dinner, table and china and what not, on a cliff overlooking the valley. Then I put balloons all around except for the side with the view. My friend played the viola for us while we ate a tri tip dinner from Dakotas Steakhouse (so good). Lastly, I played her the song I wrote for her and afterward I kneeled and asked her to marry me. Through her tears she said "Yes." And it was the most beautiful "yes" I have ever heard.

We're planning on June '07. Possibly the 16th.

I'm getting married!!!!

Soteriology

2006-03-05T08:32:36Z

Well I'm conducting a bit of a survey. If you have some time on your hands, please answer these questions from your own knowledge of what the Bible teaches on these matters.

1. What is common grace?
2. Who will be saved from eternal punishment?
3. What does it mean to believe in Jesus Christ?
4. What did James mean when he wrote "faith without works is dead" (Jas. 2:17)?
5. Did God see before the foundation of the world that some would choose him and thus decide to predestine them or did he choose them and thus enable them to choose him?
6. Does hearing and believing the Gospel lead to regeneration or does regeneration enable us to hear and believe?
7. What is the difference betweeen justification and sanctification?
8. Explain the benefits of adoption as children of God.
9. Is it possible for Christians to lose their salvation?

anyonehowtown @ 2006-01-16T10:43:00

2006-01-16T18:44:57Z

Book Ideas

Tensions of Christianity
The Classics in Context: scripture we all know, in the contexts we may have missed.
The Manners and Customs Novel - a novel so accurately immersed in the times of Jesus (without biblical characters) that it brings the reader into what it was like to live back then.
Christians and Entertainment: avoiding the syncretic and legalistic ism's.

Defense of the Faith

2005-11-02T08:48:52Z

It's not enough for Christians to have a simple understanding of their faith in this country. Persecution here isn't from angry mobs or yelling soldiers with guns. Persecution here is with intellectualism, relativist rationalism, pluralist philosophies, intolerance of the intolerant. The so called wisdom of modern scholastics is so enticing, so luring that even Christians have conformed to its pattern in direct violation of Romans 12:2. No, it's not enough to have a simple understanding of the faith. We need serious training. We need to know our Bibles. Really know our Bibles. And not just passages that we like, that bring us comfort, but passages interpreted with methods that seek to find the author's original intent (how the original audience would have understood it). Let me illustrate.

"I received a love letter from my girlfriend the other day. I opened it and flipped to the second page mindlessly and just started reading half down the page. I read, "Because of that, he kissed me on the forehead and we cuddled for the rest of the movie." I was furious! How could she let another guy kiss her and then why would she cuddle with him? And why on earth would she tell me about it like it was good news?! I was in a total outrage. I stormed over to my friends house next door and showed him the sentence I had read and he couldn't believe it either. Then when I came home, my mom noticed my mood and asked what was bothering me. I handed over the letter and went to my room. A little later my mom entered and said it was a very sweet letter and that she couldn't figure out what that had to do with my bad mood. I looked at her shocked and pointed out the sentence I had read. She laughed annoyingly happily and quickly showed me that my girlfriend was talking about her dad after they had not talked for a while because of a fight they had. They had made up and she was kissed by him on the forehead and cuddled with him like they used to do when she was littler."

Obviously, no one would actually go through this because we simply don't read letters that way. Yet so many times I find Christians reading their Bible in the same erroneous manner described above. The books of the Bible weren't meant to be chopped up into verses and chapters so that we could take any verse and make it say whatever we want it to say. The verses and chapters were only added later (uninspired) to aid in discussion. The Bible cannot say whatever you want it to say if you read it as it was intended to be read. Authorial intent is so important! Please, please, please read your Bibles knowing that the authors are trying to tell the original audience something and that God did sovereignly intend for us to draw principles from that. But don't be so arrogant as to think that God only used the original audience as vessels to get his message solely to us. Don't forget that the Bible is a sword and that like all swords it can be used poorly and for bad reasons. Know how to use your sword. Be armed! Fight the good fight!

"Grace to you and Peace from God the Father and our Lord Jesus Christ"

Peter

anyonehowtown @ 2005-07-28T23:49:00

2005-07-29T06:50:22Z

I got accepted at Eternity Bible College!

other than that i'm not doing so hot right now. but it's all good.

anyonehowtown @ 2005-07-14T22:49:00

2005-07-15T05:50:46Z

The world doesn't look the same anymore. Normal doesn't mean the same thing anymore. I don't belong here. I want to go home.

anyonehowtown @ 2005-06-15T14:35:00

2005-06-15T21:35:05Z

She loves me!

Luke 14:7-14

2005-06-14T20:05:12Z

7So He told a parable to those who were invited, when He noted how they chose the best places, saying to them: 8"When you are invited by anyone to a wedding feast, do not sit down in the best place, lest one more honorable than you be invited by him; 9and he who invited you and him come and say to you, "Give place to this man,' and then you begin with shame to take the lowest place. 10But when you are invited, go and sit down in the lowest place, so that when he who invited you comes he may say to you, "Friend, go up higher.' Then you will have glory in the presence of those who sit at the table with you. 11For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

12Then He also said to him who invited Him, "When you give a dinner or a supper, do not ask your friends, your brothers, your relatives, nor rich neighbors, lest they also invite you back, and you be repaid. 13But when you give a feast, invite the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind. 14And you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you; for you shall be repaid at the resurrection of the just."

v.7 - When He noted. . . I love the way Jesus teaches. There are those times where He does his "spiel" in the synagogues and other public gatherings, but some of his most practical and convicting lessons are taught spontaneously when He sees an opportunity to share knowledge. This was common in that day. Instead of going to high school and college, if you wanted to be educated, you would follow a teacher around and he would teach as opportunities came up, imparting his knowledge on his disciples. This is how I plan on teaching my kids about life. Too often parents either take the path of protecting their chldren from everything so their mind doesn't get corrupted. But then that just results in naivity and as soon as the child is out of the parent's house there is a huge danger for trying all the things they weren't allowed to try, finding out all the things they weren't allowed to find out. Over-protecting a child is crippling. On the other hand some parents allow their children to do anything and never teach them discernment. These are the parents who were probably raised with over-protective parents and as a reaction they do the opposite. They pray and pray for the salvation of their children but they never teach them anything. Though they are present geographically, ultimately they have neglected their child all along. This is also crippling. Children should be exposed to the world but parents should teach them discernment. Mormons aren't Christians though they talk about Jesus Christ. That homeless person is asking for beer money because he's lazy and doesn't want to get a job. The best protection any child could have is discernment. This is the parenting style of God the father.

For whoever exalts himself will be, and he who humbles himself will be exalted. What intriques me about this phrase is that it's a paradox. Similar to the paradox in 9:24 about losing your life to save it. The motivation is to save your life. Jesus knows that no man can deny his need for happiness so he tells us to lose our life for his sake to find the only satisfying happiness. It's the same thing here. No man can deny his desire to be exalted. But it is only when we humble ourselves that we are truly exalted. I can't help but connect this verse with James 4:10, "Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord and He will lift you up." This is the gospel. When we submit our lives to Christ, when we acknowledge our place before God--absolute spiritual poverty; God then declares us righteous and over the course of our lives, sanctifies us until we are finally glorified in heaven.

And you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you; for you shall be repaid at the resurrection of the just. Ouch. This verse stings. Jesus isn't saying we shouldn't invite our friends and family over for dinner. He is merely saying such a thing cannot be considered "a spiritual act of true charity" (Macarthur Study Bible). Are the acts of kindness that I do for my friends not what I thought they were? Am I patting myself on the back for sacrificing my time and energy for something it isn't really a sacrifice to do? I offer myself to my friends and family and think that I'm being a servant like Christ, but really I'm just being a friend. All friends are servants but not all servants are friends. I cannot help but connect this verse with Proverbs 25:21-22 "If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink; for so you will heap coals of fire on his head, and the LORD will reward you." This obviously isn't talking about charity, but I think the challenge is similar. It is not how you act toward friends that determines your character, but how you act toward the lesser fortunate and your enemies.

Luke 14:1-6

2005-06-13T17:51:54Z

"1 Now it happened, as He went into the house of one of the rulers of the Pharisees to eat bread on the Sabbath, that they watched Him closely. 2 And behold, there was a certain man before Him who had dropsy. 3 And Jesus, answering, spoke to the lawyers and Pharisees, saying, "Is it lawful to heal on the Sabbath?" 4 But they kept silent. And He took him and healed him, and let him go. 5Then He answered them, saying, "Which of you, having a donkey or an ox that has fallen into a pit, will not immediately pull him out on the Sabbath day?" 6 And they could not answer Him regarding these things."

He went into the house of one of. . . the Pharisees. The patience of Jesus is overwhelming. The Pharisees were the most obnoxious people to Him. If anyone ever had the right to ignore a group of people it was Jesus with the Pharisees. Earlier in Luke He unleashed several woes upon them. R. C. Sproul expounds on the wickedness of these people, explaining that external morality is all they cared about, leaving the inward condition of their heart unaltered from its evil nature. When we major in the minors, when we add rules outside of the bible (i.e. no secular music, no movies, no dancing, etc.), we become like the Pharisees, the people whom Jesus gave the most harsh warnings and curses to. But despite all of this, Jesus still dined with this Pharisee. Too often I only worry about evangelizing to people I like or to people I think would actually listen. Jesus does not evangelize with narrow mindedness. Many are called but few are chosen. Do I, like Jonah, avoid telling the truth to someone who annoys me because I don't want them to be in heaven with me? Do I have a right to lose someone's invitation in the mail? Aren't I just as annoying to Jesus as that person is to me? On the other hand, this does not mean that I am to spend all my time with friends of folly. Jesus spent most of his time with His disciples. My closest friends should be, as proverbs says, those that have godly wisdom. To be in the world but not of the world is one of the greatest tensions of Christianity.

They watched Him closely. The motivation of these Pharisees was far from pure. It is evident here that it is possible to seek God's presence with the wrong intent. Why do I wish Him to speak audibly and personally to me? Is it to receive His wisdom or is it for Him to prove Himself to me? Does God need to prove Himself to anyone? The curses Jesus gave to the Pharisees were no new concept. Several times in the Old Testament, God rejects the religious practices of the israelites because of a neglect to the heart of the matter (Isa 1:4,11; Jer 6:20; Micah 1:2). Both the Israelites in the OT and the Pharisees in the NT had the priviledge of hearing directly from the mouth of God and they still did not believe. It is only when I come to the scriptures with pure intent (a condition of the heart only God can grant, but I am responsible to pursue [Romans 12:1,2]) that I can hear from God, as He as already spoken everything I need to hear in His Word. Beyond that, I must ask for wisdom (James 1:5). On a different direction from this passage, too often I think that the way I love God and people is the only way to love God and people. When others come across my path that do this differently, I watch them closely waiting for them to fail so I can point it out and say "I must be holy. Their way failed." Little do I know that my way never worked. If I do not accept the diversity of God's children I do not love God's children. If I do not love God's children, the Bible is clear that I do not love God. C. S. Lewis constantly pops into my head at these times and says, "Do not be holier than your God."

Jesus. . . spoke. . . saying, "Is it lawful to heal on the Sabbath?" The questions Jesus asks are always probing. He always knows the answer, but merely provokes anyone who hears to give an answer that reveals their heart. The pharisees could not answer because there is no law against healing on the Sabbath. Are all of my convictions biblical? Do I judge myself and others by a law that God did not set up? Am I more concerned with obedience and sacrifice than mercy and the knowledge of God (Hosea 6:6)?

"Which of you, having a donkey. . . pull him out on the Sabbath day?" Legalists are more concerned with obedience than the wellfare of God's children. These Pharisees would have mercy on a donkey in a pit, but did not have mercy on this sick man. Ironically, the Pharisees were more sick than He was. Perhaps they were jealous of not only Jesus, but the man. At least they should have been. They were at least jealous of Jesus though. Here was a man who obeyed the mosaic law perfectly. The whole reason they set up their extra laws was to ultimately obey the laws set forth by God on mount Sinai. But they missed the point of the law. It was not for salvation but for condemnation, to lead us to Christ. The prophets whom their fathers killed knew this. Jesus told them, but they kill Him too. And don't we do the same thing? I get jealous all the time when people are better at being holy than I am. I forget that the whole point is not to impress God by being holy. The point is that God already sees us as holy and He then calls us to be worshipers in spirit and in truth. As John Piper points out, spirit and truth correspond to the questions how and whom. How do we worship? In Spirit. Whom do we worship? The truth, Jesus Christ. This is the reason why theology is so important. There is a right way to worship and there is a right God to worship. So then, when other people do great things for God, we should rejoice and worship and glory in the beauty of God's design.

And they could not answer Him regarding these things. We should have a biblical reason for everything we do. If we don't, then what is the point of Christianity as a world view?

---

I posted this mainly for my own records, but I made it public for anyone who could possibly benefit from my meditations on God's true Word.

the short film contest

2005-06-10T07:39:44Z

well we finally finished the short film.

description: 5 minutes or less on the theme: "One person can make a difference." We did a silent film about a dysfunctional family.

Christianity Tensions Between...

2005-06-04T19:37:00Z

Christianity Tensions Between. . .

Chapter 1 - Tension Defined
- Type 1: Balance between two extremes.
- Type 2: Staying on the right side of the fence.

Type 1:
1. Liberalism and Fundamentalism
- Open-handed principles, sacrificing Biblical truth.
- Closed-handed methodology, adding to Biblical truth.
- Balance: Open-handed methodology, Closed-handed principles.

2. Charismatic and Non-Charismatic
- Charismatic: Miraculous gifts of the Holy Spirit, emphasis on loving fellowship.
- Non-charismatic: Practical gifts of the Holy Spirit, emphasis on Bible Study.
- Balance: Loving application of the studied Word.

3. Overprotective Parenting and Neglectful Parenting
- Overprotective: Less grace and mercy than God.
- Neglectful: Less discipline than God.
- Balance: Disciplined obedience with grace and mercy.

4. Chauvinism and Feminism
- Chauvinism: Man in front, woman in back.
- Feminism: Woman in front, man in back
- Balance: Side-by-side, leadership by service.

Type 2 (The latter is the right side of the fence):
1. Pride and Confidence
- Pride: Feeling of rightful accomplishment.
- Confidence: Assurance of undeserved grace.

2. Gossip and Bearing Burdens
- Gossip: Praying for someone to be more like you.
- Bearing Burdens: Praying for sanctification to be more like Jesus.

3. Glorifying Creation and Glorifying Creator
- Creation: Acknowledging the Creator for the sake of creation.
- Creator: Acknowledging creation for the sake of the Creator.

4. Apathy and Faith
- Apathy: Indifference to God's will
- Faith: Submission of will to God's.

5. Flirting and Familial Love
- Flirting: You wouldn't treat your brother or sister like this.
- Familial: Not unclean-treatment of non-family members.

6. Knowing God and Believing God
- Knowing: Understanding without action.
- Believing: Understanding followed by action.

7. Verbal Love and Obedient Love
- Verbal: Love without action.
- Obedient: Love followed by action.

8. Demons and Christians
- Demons: Proper view of God without repentance.
- Christians: Proper view of God with repentance.

9. Seeking Signs and Seeking Wisdom
- Signs: Asking God to speak outside of His Word.
- Wisdom: Asking for the gift of godly wisdom.

10. Dieting and Fasting
- Dieting: No increase in prayer/bible study, only redirected time and energy.
- Fasting: Hunger is reminder of continual prayer/bible study.

11. Product Marketing and Evangelizing
- Marketing: Selling Jesus as a fix-it ticket.
- Evangelizing: Culturally relevant delivery of maximum truth.

12. Election and Responsibility
- Election: Lack of action due to "faith" in predestination.
- Responsibility: Holy fear of God's unrevealed preselection inspires action.

13. Avoiding Temptation and Avoiding Sin
- Temptation: Pharisaic self-righteousness
- Sin: In the world but not of the world.

14. Worldly Investments and Wise Planning
- Worldly Investments: Treasures stored on earth
- Wise Planning: Ready for the Master today, tomorrow and 5 generations from now.

Lifemark

2005-05-29T20:23:06Z

Well I had my first teaching gig on friday at Jess' Christian club potluck. Everyone there was great and I had a good time. I had a lot of fun teaching and I'm excited about getting better at it. Anyway, just thought i'd tell you because someday i'll go back and read this and it'd be nice to know when I started teaching. Oh, and in that case, i'll tell you what i taught on. Luke 9:23-25 and Mark 10:28-30 about the reward we received when we deny our fallen desires for Jesus' sake, aligning our desires with his.

anyonehowtown @ 2005-05-15T16:19:00

2005-05-15T23:19:02Z

Only 6% of all teens believe that there are moral absolutes--and, most troubling to evangelical leaders, only 9% of self-described born-again teens believe that moral truth is absolute.

That frustrates me to no end....

Small Prayer Survey

2005-05-13T03:58:57Z

1. What do you find to be the hardest thing about prayer?

2. Why do you think we should pray if God already has His will planned out?

3. What do you find to be the hardest thing about praying continually, throughout your day, as Paul tells us to?

4. What do you spend the most time praying about when you pray?

5. Do you find it harder to pray for people when there isn't really anything bad happening to them?

I'm preparing a series on prayer and I'd like to know what the general thoughts are on these things. You can post anonymous if you wish. Or e-mail me (puddleglumpete@gmail.com) if you wish. Thanks for your participation. Your check's in the mail.

Just an update

2005-05-11T06:40:22Z

I don't think i'll ever stop having paradigm shifts. There's so many things about myself that I still don't know fully yet, areas in my life that could be sinful that I don't even know about yet. These areas seem to keep popping up left and right to give me a scare. To frighten me back into the grace of God. Everytime I think I'm doing pretty ok, these little fellows pop out and say "You're doing terrible with _____!" This week's conviction gopher popped out and said "You're lazy, unethical, dishonest, and idolizing gods other than God." As usual that gopher came from seattle. And as usual, he's right, because really, he's just a messenger. I prayed the dangerous prayer: God make me humble; God make me more like you. And everytime I pray that I tend to forget how shocking the answer to that pray really is. I would never take back any time that I've prayed it, but you'd think I'd prepare myself for it better. God's grace is open to me so freely if I would just humbly, yet confidently, go to Him. But i lean on my own understanding. I don't acknowledge Him in all my ways. And thus He can't make my paths straight. I haven't done my part. Well, now's a better time than ever to change that. Here I go...

From a Letter to Pamela (because I'm too lazy to type retype it for you)

2005-05-06T18:24:01Z

"By now Jeannette should have told you that I've been feeling that maybe God is calling me to be a pastor. I've been praying about it so much; I've never prayed about anything more. This is huge. Get comfortable because I'm going to write about this for a bit. . . . I've always known that God's called me to some sort of leadership/teaching job. Still thinking that film has a big role to play in that, I've lately been feeling more and more of a desire to teach not only via films but also by preaching to a local congregation (captive audience if you will). The main thing holding me back from really thinking that I was meant for that is I'm not very talkative. I just don't seem to have the personality that most pastors tend to have. So I thought that maybe I just have a passion for teaching and that I'd steer that passion toward filmmaking. But as I said, I've been getting a stronger desire for local congregational ministry: more ideas, more frustrations with current local churches dumbing down Gospel Truth, deeper studying of God's word, sharing the result of those studies with anyone who crosses my path—those such things. Even with only three classes this semester and really only one of them with homework, I get frustrated that either I study the Bible as much as I really want to (a few hours after classes) and I fall way behind in English homework. Or I keep up with my school work but I'm only studying the Word for half an hour to an hour and it's not as in depth as I really desire it to be. So I really really want a job where I can study the Word in depth without sacrificing other responsibilities. Well that fits in with being a pastor but it can't be a reason to become a pastor. It has to be a call from God, which is what I'm still praying for clarity on. Well it turns out that the requirements given by Paul in 1 Timothy for elders/pastors doesn't list “talkative” or “outgoing” anywhere, just “able to teach.” So my main reason for holding out on this apparent calling is totally shot.

On one hand I'm completely excited about the idea of planting a church (from scratch probably). I'm excited about the idea of teaching God's Word to people and being innovative with cultural outreach. But then on the other hand, I'm scared witless about the definite possibility of failure and maybe even more so of the possibility of success; I'm fearful of interpreting the Bible wrong and leading people down the wrong path; fearful of financially keeping a church afloat; of financially supporting my family.

On that note. . . providing for my future wife and kids is a huge thing for me. One of my biggest fears with going into the film industry is that it's a really hard field to make money in, unless you're one of the lucky few who get big time projects. But with the movies I want to make that's really not likely to happen. That scares me. With being a pastor the risk of finance is still there though not as much, but again that can't be a reason for becoming a pastor. Ideally I want to make enough money that my wife won't have to work. If she wants to that's great but I don't want her to have to work. And at least when the kids are young I'd like her to be at home helping raise them. Education is a whole other story. I hate American education (it's practically an oxymoron). And I'd like to start a college fund for not only my kids but my grandkids. And lastly, I'd like to be able to pay for at least the down payment on my kids' first home. Christians should think about their families 3-5 generations down the line, preparing to be here for a long time, spreading God's word.

Anyway, enough of that. I laid awake in bed for like an hour this morning just thinking about ideas (for way way in the future) should this church plant actually happen and be successful. First of all everything would be about Jesus and for Jesus. That's important for me to keep in mind because a lot of these ideas have been my dream for quite a while, but I never anticipated actually doing them and it just hit me this morning that they'd be great for outreaching. That said, here we go. As was aforementioned (I love that word), film making is one thing I definitely want to foster at the church. Short films, mostly, that can be showed as a modern day parable for what God wants to say to us. Eventually, we'd have our own film festival where anyone Christian or non-Christian could screen their film there (if approved by a Christian board). The reason for accepting non-Christian films is so that they would go to the film screenings and see the Christian films, hear the gospel, and the rest is up to the Holy Spirit. Like I said, these would be outreaching events. One of things that frustrates me about many churches is that they have events that only appeal to Christians and then call them outreaching events; but really it's just a cyclical ministry, preaching the gospel to ourselves over and over again. It's awesome that many people renew their faith there or people bring their non-Christian friends and the Holy Spirit still takes hold of them. But how much more could the Holy Spirit take hold of the unsaved if they're at events that they'd normally go to anyway. The difference is it's Christians running the events and the message is the gospel, not the message of secular society.

Along the line of events, I'd also like to start a concert venue, which would also allow non-Christian bands to play. Los Angeles is famous for their concert venues and it doesn't make sense that there aren't any Christian ones. I'd love to change that.

And finally, this is probably my most selfish and thinly stretched idea but it's an idea nonetheless. I want to start a fast food restaurant that would also have a small stage for acoustic bands and couches/chairs for people to just hang out on. I'm thinking there would be TV's playing the short films from our festivals and perhaps other short films from churches who are doing similar things (which there are; just not in California). America in general is fast running out of places for teens to hang out at, as evidenced by us not knowing what to do after Red's. So my idea for this would be to provide a place for people to go when they're bored or when they want to meet people and while they're their the gospel will be heard. . . . And of course, there would be pizza dogs. . . . Sorry! I couldn't resist!"

Cloud 9

2005-04-25T06:34:05Z

peterbutterjames: so there's this girl... she's one of my best friends... and i started liking her recently but i want to be friends for a while.... but anyway, i found out she likes me too and so now we both know about it.... and i'm not sure if i should say things like 'i miss you' or other such things if we're just friends for now.... what do you think?
cleanqueengirlie: i think you should... it's sweet.
cleanqueengirlie: :-D
peterbutterjames: well if you say so
peterbutterjames: i do rather enjoy saying such things
peterbutterjames: you think she'll feel the same way?
peterbutterjames: lol
cleanqueengirlie: yes. if she has any sense whatsoever.
peterbutterjames: i'm willing to bet that she does
peterbutterjames: you should meet her.... she's making me fall for her really fast
peterbutterjames: i might have to buy a parachute pretty soon
cleanqueengirlie: lol.
peterbutterjames: anyway... how was your day?
cleanqueengirlie: good.
cleanqueengirlie: except for the boredom thing.
peterbutterjames: gotcha
peterbutterjames: next time you should count sheep
peterbutterjames: and name them
peterbutterjames: oh wait... then you'll fall asleep
peterbutterjames: nevermind
cleanqueengirlie: no, i liked what i was doing much better.
peterbutterjames: what was that?
cleanqueengirlie: thinking about this friend that i have that i'm totally falling for.
peterbutterjames: hey we're in the same boat
peterbutterjames: what a coincidence
cleanqueengirlie: crazy!
peterbutterjames: i really can't remember the last time i felt like this
peterbutterjames: i got off the phone with her the other day and i was smiling so much i couldn't even talk to tell my mom why i was smiling
cleanqueengirlie: wow, your friend is super lucky.
peterbutterjames: no no
peterbutterjames: i'm the lucky one.

Just one of those things I read and really stuck with me...

2005-04-22T22:39:58Z

"I close this chapter with a testimony from a great man of prayer and faith. George Müller (1805-1898) is famous for establishing orphanages in England and for joyfully depending on God for all his needs:

While I was staying at Nailsworth, it pleased the Lord to teach me a truth, irrespective of human instrumentality, as far as I know, the benefit of which I have not lost, though now. . .more than forty years have since passed away.

The point is this: I saw more clearly than ever, that the first great and primary business to which I ought to attend every day was, to have my soul happy in the Lord. The first thing to be concerned about was not, how much I might serve the Lord, how I might glorify the Lord; but how I might get my soul into a happy state, and how my inner man might be nourished. For I might seek to set the truth before the unconverted, I might seek to benefit believers, I might seek to relieve the distressed, I might in other ways seek to behave myself as it becomes a child of God in this world; and yet, not being happy in the Lord, and not being nourished and strengthened in my inner man day by day, all this might not be attended to in a right spirit.

Before this time my practice had been, at least for ten years previous, as an habitual thing, to give myself to prayer, after having dressed in the morning. Now I saw, that the most important thing I had to do was to give myself to the reading of the Word of God and to meditation on it, that thus my heart might be comforted, encouraged, warned, reproved, instructed; and that thus, whilst meditating, my heart might be brought into experimental, communion with the Lord. I began therefore, to meditate on the New Testament, from the beginning, early in the morning.

The first thing I did, after having asked in a few words the Lord's blessing upon His precious Word, was to begin to meditate on the Word of God; searching, as it were, into every verse, to get blessing out of it; not for the sake of the public ministry of the Word; not for the sake or preaching on what I had meditated upon; but for the sake of obtaining food for my own soul. The result I found to be almost invariably this, that after a very few minutes my soul has been led to confession, or to thanksgiving, or to intercession, or to supplication; so that though I did not, as it were, give myself to prayer, but to meditation, yet it turned almost immediately more or less into prayer.

The difference between my former practice and my present one is this. Formerly, when I rose, I began to pray as soon as possible, and generally spent all my time till breakfast in prayer, or almost all the time. At all events I almost invariably began with prayer.. . . But what was the result? I often spent a quarter of an hour, or half an hour, or even an hour on my knees before being conscious to myself of having derived comfort, encouragement, humbling of soul, etc.; and often after having suffered much from wandering of mind for the first ten minutes, or a quarter of an hour, or even half an hour, I only then began really to pray.

I scarcely ever suffer now in this way. For my heart being nourished by the truth, being brought into experimental fellowship with God, I speak to my Father, and to my Friend (viole though I am, and unworthy of it!) about the things that He has brought before me in His precious Word."

I, myself, have discovered that it's better to spend a week of "devotion" time to the understanding of one verse than to keep in time with a schedule of a chapter or two a day. Overall readings of the text aren't bad, but they're far from what is meant by the command to study His Word. Also, I have discovered that my attitude, my motive for studying has not always been godly. I should study for my own nourishment, not so that I can call people on their sins or impress people with my knowledge of scripture, but so I can be happy in Jesus Christ. I struggle with that even now as I type this for everyone who reads my posts to see, but as I transition my motives I thought it'd be even more of a bad thing to withhold this eye-opening paradigm shift from whoever may read it. I love you all. God bless.

On the Set Again

2005-04-20T08:17:06Z

Well I just got home from being on a movie set for a short film. And the whole time I was just so excited and saying to my self over and over "This is what I want to do with the rest of my life." I love being on set... I love the long hours... I love the rush of getting everything set up and then watching the actors transform into characters from another world. I love all the energy and collaboration. Where else do you get so many people working together for one goal and loving every contribution they can possibly make? Where else do you get free food and drinks all day? haha. Well anyway, I can't wait to do my own films professionally. I can't wait to make movies that'll move people, that'll mean something and provoke emotions and change lives.

www.nooma.com

That's what I want to do... movies like that but with my own style. Gah I can't wait to do this!

Goodnight... I get to wake up in 5 hours and spend 18+ hours on the set again tomorrow!

A Poem

2005-04-14T02:13:17Z

Hello Friend, I'm glad I met you here
Or was it a bad time?
Hypotheticals I fear..
What if I could press unlock
And lights flashed
So I could find you parked?

We'd drive off together

It's hot at first
The air then cools us off
I can't seem to find the right degree
You broke down along the way
We parted for repair

These Lives collide
Both uninsured
To redefine
The shaping curves...

Hello Rain, I'm glad you fell for me
Or was it off-season?
Hypotheticals I fear
What if the drought didn't end
With acidic pollution
So my wall would not erode?

This well kept safe

Purity satisfying,
I can't seem to wait for.
But harsh rains create soft ground
So the corrosion wasn't in vain.
Still we part for repair

These lives collide
And both impure
To wait for tides
Worth drinking from...

A New Hope

2005-04-03T08:46:54Z

no this hope doesn't involve han solo or luke skywalker. It involves someone much prettier. Well it started quite a while ago really... when my sister, sarah, and her cousin pamela and i first starting going on day trips to places like santa barbara and venice. but we never really talked then so i didn't think much of it. but lately we've been talking a lot and i've discovered how much i really enjoy her company. well, i feel extremely blessed and undeserving of the apparent fact that she returns that enjoyment for my company too. but, i'm afraid of messing this up like i'm so good at doing. so it's time to trust in God. it's always time to trust in God, but specifically with this new hope i need to focus on him and his will and make decisions accordingly. it'll take lots of patience and perseverance, but if God means for it to happen it will... in any case, focusing on him will bring about the best results so that's what i shall strive for. God, you are too wonderful to me. i really don't deserve the blessings you've given me. i really don't deserve to know your grace and love. thank you so much for being those things and showing them to me. I love you, God. goodnight.

Total Paradigm Shift

2005-03-21T21:15:30Z

I think this is really important, so I scanned it in instead of trying to put it in my own words.

I'm still examining this and testing it with scripture. But so far it has held up.

"The Gospel in a Pluralist Society"

2005-03-18T21:00:18Z

" 'The full number of the Gentiles will be gathered in and all Israel will be saved.' Paul's vision is truly cosmic and universal. His earlier description of Jesus as the new Adam also points in that direction. 'As one man's trespass led to the condemnation for all, so one man's act of righteousness leads to acquital and life for all' (Rom. 5:18). And yet the same Paul can say of himself that he must exercise the strictest self-discipline 'lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified' (1 Cor. 9:27). It seems to me that the whole nature of the gospel requires us to maintain this tension and not to try to resolve it either by a rationalistic universalism which denies the possibility of finally missing the mark, or by increasingly fruitless arguments about who will and who will not be saved. When Jesus was asked the question about whether few or many would be saved he declined to answer it but sternly warned the questioner to strive to enter the narrow door that leads to life. His often repeated words about the reversal of expectations (the first shall be last and the last first) and the parables which suggest that those who are confident will find themselves excluded and those who never expected it find themselves welcomed, all point in the same direction. There is a kind of confidence which leads to complacency, and there is a kind of anxiety which leads to selfish efforts to save oneself. It seems to me clear from the whole New Testament that the Christian life has room both for a godly confidence and for a godly fear. The contrast between these is not a contradiction. If I know that God in his limitless grace and kindness has chosen and called me to be a bearer of his grace for others, my trust in him will not exclude the awareness that I could betray his trust in me, and that very awareness will drive me closer to him. This is a deeply personal relationship. It excludes, I think, the kind of rationalistic universalism which I have referred to. It also excludes, I think, any temptation to set limits to God's grace, or to write off any human being as beyond God's redeeming love" (Lesslie Newbigin, emphasis added).

This is a lesson I've been learning a lot lately about Christianity. It is a tension between extremes. Between conservative and liberal, universalism and its opposite, being in the world but not of the world. So many times, to avoid one extreme we run and hide in the other and thus commit just as serious a sin from the one we tried to avoid. Proverbs says to avoid all extremes. We are to be a people in constant tension. The liberal interpreters of the bible will justify their sins by claiming to be "in the world." And the conservative interpreters will justify their sins by claiming to not be "of the world." Drink but do not get drunk. Listen to secular music, but do not let it master you. Watch tv, but do not lust or covet or let it fill your mind with impure thoughts. See the world through God's loving and gracious eyes. Find the homages to the "unknown god" in our society and connect the gap. This is hard; it's why the word tension is so perfect a description of it. And it's why we cannot do it on our own strength.

Saving Faith

2005-03-16T20:25:46Z

i did a mini-research paper for a friend on the question "Is it possible to lose your salvation?" instead of doing english homework. anyway, just thought i'd share it. let me know if you disagree with anything.

My immediate response to the question is it's not possible to lose your salvation. But I should back that up with scripture probably (usually a good idea huh). So here goes.

"And I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand. My Father who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of My Father's hand."
- John 10:28,29

Kind of a weak argument for the topic, but i think anyone and no one is all inclusive meaning that even the person themselves can't leave the Father's hand. The hand being the hand of salvation because he says "eternal life." In a sense, no one is out of God's sovereign hand, but this is the salvation hand that only a few are in. Next verse...

". . . being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ."
- Philippians 1:6

". . . looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross. . ."
- Hebrews 12:2

"Inasmuch as He who built the house has more honor than the house. For every house is built by someone, but He who built all things is God. . . . but Christ as a Son over His own house, whose house we are if we hold fast the confidence and the rejoicing of the hope firm to the end."
- Hebrews 3: 3,4,6

The conditional phrase is similar to the one that Jesus says in John 15 "You are My friends if you do whatever I command you." It's not saying that obedience will result in friendship with Christ but rather that obedience is evidence resulting from a friendship with Christ. In the same way, holding fast to the confidence is evidence resulting from our being Jesus' house. Since God is the author and perfecter of our faith, if we say that someone loses their salvation we're calling God incompetent and a liar. Which in the words of Dr. Emmett Brown, would create a paradox, the result of which could cause a chain reaction that would unravel the very fabric of the space-time continuum and destroy the entire universe!

I think the verse that confuses this issue is the one about grafting branches and what not. well let's find it.

"And if some of the branches were broken off, and you, being a wild olive tree, were grafted in among them, and with them became a partaker of the root and fatness of the olive tree, do not boast against the branches. But if you do boast, remember that you do not support the root, but the root supports you. You will say then, 'Branches were broken off that I might be grafted in.' Well said. Because of unbelief they were broken off, and you stand by faith. Do not be haughty, but fear. For if God did not spare the natural branches, He may not spare you either. Therefore consider the goodness and severity of God: on those who fell, severity; but toward you, goodness, if you continue in His goodness. Otherwise you also will be cut off."
- Romans 11:17-22

I think the difference between branches that are grafted in and remain and branches that are grafted in but not spared (i.e. people who leave the faith) is the difference between knowledge of the mind and belief of the heart. For some unknown reason, God predestined people to have knowledge of His saving grace, but not have saving faith result from that knowledge. Somehow, that brings glory to God. Notice also, that it's not the branches jumping out of the root, but rather God is the one uprooting them. The person who "leaves the faith" never had saving faith to begin with, but was rather a wolf in sheeps clothing. In Acts, paul talks about wolves coming in and not sparing the flock (Acts 20:25-31). It's easy to declare that person a wolf when reading the text, but when you actually see it happen it's a hard reality to face. However, it's a reality nonetheless. There's a spiritual war going on and satan is smarter than us, but ultimately God is overseeing everything and He has some reason for the 'wolves' and the damage they do. Anyway, i hope that answers the question well enough.

anyonehowtown @ 2005-03-13T23:24:00

2005-03-14T07:24:49Z

God is amazing beyond words... i don't even know what to say...